Summer Time And The Winning’s Easy

2011-05-25 09.50.49It may not officially be summertime yet, but I’m already on Summer Time.

I’ve already missed a deadline, completely forgot I was s’posed to bring a covered dish to my church yesterday, and found three messages, lingering on my phone. And that’s only the stuff I know about…

My brain seems to turn a bit mushy once my feet slide into flip-flops. So I’m not so good for the hard-core writing work but the fun stuff? Why, yes, thank you. And I thought maybe you’d like the fun stuff, too. Like these gems:

The Second Annual Pretty Much World Famous Illustration Contest for Children’s Illustrators over at Susanna Leonard Hill’s place. She always has lots of fabulous prizes and lots of fun at her contests, so if you have any illustration talent, give it a try. (Technically, I don’t have any illustration talent. But somehow, in the summer, I think I do. My friends in Margaritaville might have something to do with that…)

Anyhoo, here’s a contest that you don’t have to do anything. I mean, you have to zip over to Goodreads and you have to sign up, but that’s not asking too much when you consider you might win Lovely Lisa Ricard Claro’s debut romance novel, Love Built To Last. Then you can lay about on your lounge chair on your back deck, reading and wishing you had a hunky carpenter like Caleb Walker working on said deck, maybe leaning over you to get to his hammer, or losing his shirt because it’s just so dang hot, or…um.

Yeah, moving on to a contest where you can win another book, Power Elements of Character Development by Rebecca Luella Miller. So no uh…day-dreaming… with this one, but possibly your dreams of writing the most awesome, super fantastic book ever can come true if you win it! And all you have to do is write a Burma Shave type jingle. Which appeals to me because a. jingles are shirt short. And b. Well, I seem to have forgotten b.

See what I mean? Summer Time, y’all. (Good luck!)

Halloween Temptation

halloween 002I am NOT going to write a story for Susanna Leonard Hill’s Halloweensie Contest.

I’m terribly behind in all kinds of work.

Then again, a wee break to read a couple Halloween stories, one hundred words or less…

I laughed, I sighed, I imagined all sorts of frightfully fun pictures. But I am not going to write a story.

Reading stories, though, that’s a different matter. So many friends I recognized. A few more chuckles, noting the clever use of the words “broomstick” and “pumpkin” and “creak” and how I might use those same words in my story and GET THEE BEHIND ME, HALLOWEENSIE CONTEST.

Aw, pfffft. Self-control (and work) is highly overrated.

 

 

My story for  Susanna Leonard Hill’s Halloweensie Contest:

 

The Scariest Thing Ever

 

Penelope Witch’s stomach growled.

She hitched up her broomstick. “I’ve got a craving for a wicked treat!”

“Be careful,” said Mother. “Those horrible monsters! The howling and screeching, the wailing and whining!”

“I’ll be extra careful,” said Penelope.

Penelope parked and shuddered. An eerie light loomed ahead.

A door opened with a creak, and a shiver tingled down her spine.

She tiptoed past terrors, large and small, trembling in her boots.

At last, she reached out her hand—and shrieked!

“What’s got into her?” asked the grocery store clerk.

The baker pointed to a sign: Pumpkin Pie—Sold Out!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friday’s Fun Find: A Fishy Tale (It’s the March Madness Writing Contest!)

Come on, now. You knew I was going to write a fractured fairy tale for Susanna Leonard Hill’s contest, right?

And as I sat, staring at my blog, a fish fairy tale came to me. (You probably saw that coming, too.) But as I wrote, another fairy tale came to me, and then another, and …well, you’ll just have to read for yourself:

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A Fishy Tale

 

One spring day, a fish was swimming in its stream. He heard footsteps on the bridge above.

 Knick-knack, knick-knack went the steps.

 “Hey!” the fish roared in a bubbly squeak. “Who’s that knick-knacking across my bridge?”

 A little girl peered over the bridge. “It is I, Little Red Riding Hood. I’m taking goodies to Granny’s house.”

 “Give me your goodies or I shall eat you up,” said the fish.

 “Hmph,” said the girl. “You are a fish. But since you are hungry, I will give you a few crumbs.”

 She tossed a few crumbs and then crossed the bridge, turning right at the fork in the road.

 Soon, the fish heard soft padding across the bridge.

 “Who’s that softly padding across my bridge?” squeaked-roared the fish.

 “It is I, the Big Bad Wolf,” said a very scary-looking wolf. “And I am going to eat you up!”

 “Wait,” cried the fish. “There is a much tastier morsel than I. If you take the left fork in the road, you shall find a sweet, little girl.”

The fish was pleased that he had directed the wolf in the wrong direction. Alas, he had sent the wolf down the shortcut to Granny’s. But that’s a story for another day.

Soon, three little pigs skipped over the bridge.

 “Who’s that skip-skipping over my bridge?” squeaked the fish. (It was a busy bridge, and his roar was quite given out.)

 The third little pig, known as the brains of the bunch, baited a hook. “It’s the Three Little Pigs,” said the third pig. He tugged at the line and up came the fish.  “And we will have a fine dinner today.”

 “Wait,” said the fish. “I will grant you a wish if you let me go.”

 “Whee!” said the first piggy.

 “We want roast beef for supper,” said the second piggy.

 “Done,” said the fish. “Turn left at the fork. You’ll find lots of nice, red meat.”

 The two piggies released the fish.

 “Oh, for crying out loud,” said the third pig, who much preferred fish to meat. He stormed off the bridge, tripping over a stack of bricks. “Hmmm,” he said. “These bricks will come in handy.”

 The pig worked all day, laying bricks at the fork in the road. When he was done, he had a swell seafood restaurant and two little piggy waiters.

Plus all the business he could possibly handle.

 Bet you didn’t see that coming, right?

 (I hope you have a chance to read more of the fractured fairy tales this fine weekend. And P.S. It’s not too late to write your own!)

 

 

Friday’s Fun Find: March Madness Contest!

I’m feeling just a tad crazy this Friday, (two words: puppy + training) so Susanna Leonard Hill’s March Madness Contest is the perfect fit for this Friday’s Fun Find.

And all you have to do is write a crazy, fractured fairy tale, no longer than 400 words, on a springtime theme (or not, completely up to you). And the prizes? Oh, my White Rabbit! 

A critique by an agent, critiques by esteemed authors, Amazon gift cards, signed picture books…well, it’s insane all the prizes Susanna’s piled up. So write your fractured fairy tale and post it on your blog between March 20th and March 24th.

I mean, you’d be crazy to pass up this deal. And if you’ve also been trying to house train a puppy who takes his business very literally, then you might need a break. 

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A Halloweensie Story (With Apologies to Mr. Poe)

I may be too old for trick-or-treating, but that doesn’t mean a girl can’t have a little boo-rific fun. And as I’m pretty fond of Edgar Allan Poe and poetry and Susanna Leonard Hill’s writing contests, it all came together. In a hundred words or less.

 

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The (Scaredy) Cat

 

Once upon a midnight spooky, while I roamed in my Suzuki,

Looking for my black cat, lost among the trees.

I thought I heard a mewing, or was it more like booing?

A booing ever softly, whistling through the breeze.

“H-hello?” I asked the dark, the shadows in the park.

When suddenly a cackle sounded in my ear.

 

 

And then I caught a peek, of something black—it streaked!

Across the grass, and sprang onto the floor!

I nearly jumped out of my skin, as it settled down right in—

my lap. Sweet dreams, kitty.  But for me, nevermore!

 

There’s still time for you to jump in and join the Halloween fun! As for me, I think I deserve a Butterfinger. Or six.