Something Smells Around Here

True story:

When Oldest Junior Hall was six, Juniorest Hall came along. Maybe it’s a boy thing, but Juniorest Hall was a particularly stinky baby. Big brother complained all the time about the smell in the house. All. The. Time. And then somewhere (I’ve always suspected it was the cartoon Ghostbusters), Oldest Junior Hall learned about the gas mask. He thought that would be the perfect solution to his stinky problem. He asked for a gas mask. All. The. Time. At first, I thought it was funny. Then it became annoying. And then it became a story to go down in Hall Family Lore. Because Oldest Junior Hall sat on Santa’s lap and ASKED FOR A GAS MASK.

“Ho, ho, ho,” said Santa. “Why do you want a gas mask, little boy?”

“Because it smells in my house,” said the little boy. “And I mean bad.”

Sometimes, when I’m writing, I think of the gas mask and what that little boy said on Santa’s lap. Because I read what I’ve written and think, “Boy. Something smells here. And I mean bad.”

Fortunately, I have strategies now to deal with stinky writing. But you’ll have to go over to The Muffin to see my latest post if you want to read what the strategies are.

I didn’t share the gas mask story there. I thought maybe we could keep that just between us, okay?

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8 thoughts on “Something Smells Around Here

  1. Honest to goodness, as I am reading your post, four year old Nicole walks in and asks, ‘What smells? What is soooo stinky?”

    Turns out hubby, who stores food like a squirrel in winter, discovered an OLD case of canned corn, and rather than taking MY adice, puncture the can and pitch it, he decided to open each. The first can of stinky corn spilled under the fridge.

  2. So funny. Thanks for making me laugh out loud. I can just hear the kid telling Santa about his stinky house.

    I had a little one who was smelly, too. Her native name, given by her grandmother was something I can’t even pronounce, but it translated East Wind. I used to tell her she should have been named South Wind, because she never burped. It always came out the other end.

    • Hahahahaha! That’s pretty good, Sally. We have a couple names for (still stinky) Juniorest Hall (all of which are easily pronounceable, but not so much shareable on a family blog.)

  3. That is hilarious! My oldest was the super stinker for sure! When I was reading about the little one on Santa’s lap, I thought, Oh no! Can you imagine what Santa must have thought? I’m sure he had a story or two to tell that Christmas too.

    I absolutely had to click on the “Something Smells Around Here” post since I just finished writing about my super-senses and my stinky house in my post “High-Functioning My Ass-perger’s.”

    Now that I’ve been shopping for air fresheners to try to fix my stinky house problem, I am heading right over to The Muffin to find out how to fix my stinky writing problem.

    Thanks Cathy!

  4. I love this post!! Thanks for making me laugh…but I have a hard time believing your writing stinks that much anymore. I was just bragging about you the other day. 🙂

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